Now I’m not saying that they all convey the same message but there is a somewhat subliminal theme that I see and it’s always about self-hate. Self-hate? Now, I went straight to Google to make sure my definition of self-hate was correct, a personal dislike of oneself. So now my question is, why is it that everything a female of African descent does is immediately tied to self-hate? She has a perm? Self-hate. She wears colored contacts? Self-hate. She wears fake nails? Self-hate. Why is that when it comes to females of African descent, and especially within the natural hair community, if you’re not portraying the stereotypical vision of what an African or African-American is, you hate yourself and you’re trying to become white? This is why I averted away from a lot of natural hair blogs because for some reason if an African/black girl has pin-straight extensions or she’s wearing contacts, she’s trying to be white. Says who?! Now, I don’t know if I’m going crazy but I’m pretty sure that females who are Spanish, Hispanic, Asian, Caucasian, black, brown, white, yellow, pink or brown get extensions, wear fake nails, wear contacts/circle lenses and straighten their hair too. So, why, please can somebody please explain to me why is that if someone of my complexion does it, she “disowns her heritage” or “she’s a sellout that’s trying to become another ethnicity”? I don’t get it. I just don’t. I am allowed to wear blue, green, hazel or gray circle lenses because I like them and I like how they make me look. It doesn’t mean that I’m rejecting my Nigerian background or I want to be Asian. What? Does this even make sense? Yes I’m natural but that doesn’t mean I’m against wearing weaves or wigs or I destroy relaxers while chanting songs by Erykah Badu. Yes I like the hair I was born with. Yes I think extensions are fine, as long as they blend. No I don’t preach to girls who get relaxers. Do I think we need them? No. But today’s day in age, it’s a personal choice.
Black Girls and Blond Hair? Media-Induced Self Hate?
This reminds me of an article I read on a natural hair blog (because i’m currently transitioning) that was like “dear women with perms, not everyone with natural hair looks down on women with perms.” But In the comments there just HAD to be an article was like “but I still feel sorry for girls stuck on that creamy crack.” -_-‘
I definitely think there is a lot more work we can do to make sure that the (much needed) messages empowerment of empowerment for natural hair and black beauty in general does not have to come at the expense of TEARING other women with who man different choices DOWN.
I’m all for education and teaching people where dominant messages come from.. but… I dunno, I just have a problem with sending people the message that their choices make them “not black enough” in anyones eyes - people have to struggle with those things everyday…